100% FREE

Get Your Business Online Today

No Money? No Problem!

Bob's Car Detail. Aunt Susan's Pies. Dave's Moving Truck. Juan's Cucina. Earl's Buzz Cuts.

Just give us a small % when you make sales. That's it.

How It Works (Dead Simple)

1

Sign Up FREE

No credit card. No hosting fees. No bullshit. Just fill out the form below.

2

We Set You Up

We build your page, add you to THE BIG ASS MAP, and get you visible online.

3

You Make Money

When someone orders your pies, books your truck, or gets a haircut - we take a tiny %.

4

Upgrade Anytime

When you're making bank, upgrade to keep more $ and get advanced features.

The Deal

FREE
You pay $0 to get started.
We take 15% of sales (including ALL processing fees).
(Only when you actually make money!)

💡 What This Means for You:

Customer pays $100 →

You get: $85

We handle ALL payment processing fees (Stripe, Plaid, Mercury, Coinbase, Kinesis).
No surprise fees. No hidden costs. Just 15% total.

vs. The Alternatives (with REAL costs)

Shopify: $29-399/mo + 2.9% + $0.30 per sale
Amazon Seller: $39.99/mo + 15% + payment fees + fulfillment
Square: $0/mo + 2.6% + $0.10 (but limited features)
Stripe Direct: 2.9% + $0.30 (but you build everything yourself)
EwePIP Free Tier: $0/mo + 15% ALL-IN (we pay processing)

💳 All Payment Processors - All Fees Included

Choose any processor you want - we cover ALL the fees!

Stripe 2.9%? Plaid 0.5%? Coinbase fees? We pay them. You keep 85%.

💳

Stripe

Credit cards, ACH, instant payouts

🏦

Plaid

Direct bank connections, instant verification

⚡

Mercury

Fast business banking, same-day ACH

₿

Coinbase

Crypto payments, convert to USD instantly

🌟

Kinesis

Gold/silver backed crypto - coming soon

You choose how you get paid! Instant deposits, ACH transfers, or crypto. Your money, your way.

Real Local Businesses (Like You!)

🚗
Bob's Car Detail
Mobile Car Detailing

Bob details cars in people's driveways. No shop, no employees. Just him, his van, and some soap.

What Bob Gets FREE:

  • Page on THE BIG ASS MAP
  • Online booking system
  • Customer reviews
  • Payment processing
  • SMS notifications

Bob pays: 15% all-in (we cover processing fees!)

🥧
Aunt Susan's Pies
Homemade Pies & Cookies

Susan bakes pies at home. Used to only sell at church. Now she's online.

What Susan Gets FREE:

  • Online store with photos
  • Order management
  • Delivery scheduling
  • Customer database
  • Email marketing

Susan pays: 15% all-in (we cover processing fees!)

🚚
Dave's Moving Truck
Man with Van Service

Dave has a truck. People need stuff moved. Simple business, hard to get found online.

What Dave Gets FREE:

  • Service listing on map
  • Booking calendar
  • Route optimization
  • Customer messaging
  • Payment collection

Dave pays: 15% all-in (we cover processing fees!)

🍝
Juan's Cucina
Home Kitchen Delivery

Juan cooks authentic Mexican food at home. Better than restaurants, can't afford a storefront.

What Juan Gets FREE:

  • Menu page with photos
  • Online ordering
  • Delivery coordination
  • Customer reviews
  • Inventory tracking

Juan pays: 15% all-in (we cover processing fees!)

✂️
Earl's Buzz Cuts
Barbershop - Single Chair

Earl cuts hair. One chair, walk-ins only. Wanted online booking but Square costs $50/mo.

What Earl Gets FREE:

  • Booking calendar
  • Appointment reminders
  • Customer history
  • No-show protection
  • Tip collection

Earl pays: 15% all-in (we cover processing fees!)

🐕
Maria's Pet Sitting
Dog Walking & Pet Care

Maria loves dogs. Walks them while people are at work. Used to rely on Rover (30% fee!).

What Maria Gets FREE:

  • Service profile page
  • Scheduling system
  • Client management
  • Photo updates to owners
  • Payment processing

Maria pays: 15% all-in vs Rover's 30%! (we cover processing fees)

What People Say

"I couldn't afford Shopify. Now I'm making $500/week selling my pies online. 15% is nothing compared to what I was spending on nothing."

- Susan, Baker

"Rover was taking 30%. This platform only takes 15% AND I get to keep my customer relationships. Plus it's actually free to start."

- Maria, Dog Walker

"I tried to build a website once. Gave up. This was set up in 24 hours and I'm already getting bookings from THE MAP."

- Dave, Man with Van

🤖 NEW! AI-Powered Business Setup

Let AI generate your business page with custom music, pricing & content in 30 seconds!

Get Started FREE Today

We'll contact you within 24 hours to set everything up!

Stop Waiting. Start Earning.

No money? No problem. Just give us 15% when you make sales.

We succeed when you succeed. That's the deal.

Sign Up FREE Now

Questions? Talk to EWE - our AI will answer everything.

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